Perspectives on Fatherhood – Part 3

This interview is from Delroy Beckford. He shares his perspectives on fatherhood. The article is the latest in the fatherhood series.

Margo: Can you tell us a bit about yourself?

Delroy: I am a father of three children, and husband of one wife. I am in my late fifties and have been married for twenty-nine (29) years.

Margo: What do you like most about being a father?

Delroy: I like when we are all together, whether we are on the road or at home. I also like being at their games as their number one supporter, and I like when we go on vacation.

Margo: What has been the most challenging thing about being a father?

Delroy: One of the most challenging things about being a father is to exercise tough love. I just don’t have it in me to be tough on them.

Margo: What has been the biggest lesson(s) you’ve learnt about being a father?

Delroy: One of the biggest lessons I have learnt about being a father is loving my children equally without having or showing favouritism. I also learnt patience and tolerance, and how to slow down and listen.

Margo: How has your own childhood influenced your fathering?

Delroy: My childhood influenced me to be present in my children’s life as I didn’t have much of my father in mine. I also try to give my children some of the things I would have liked to get when I was growing up; that is, things that my mother could not afford.

Margo: What do you think is/are the biggest misconception(s) about Jamaican fathers and what about Jamaican fathers do you want people to know?

Delroy: Most Jamaican fathers are thought of as missing in action and lazy. This is not generally the case as they are sometimes not given a fair chance to contribute to the life of their child/children. I would like people to know that Jamaican fathers can be very supportive in the home as a mother would be.

 Margo: As a new father, have you felt like you needed support? If so, where do you turn to for that support?

Delroy: As a new father, I needed and got support from family, particularly, from my mother-in-law who moved in with us for a few weeks. This was very invaluable.

Margo: Do you think fathers are getting the support they need or do we need to do more as a society to support fathers? If fathers need support, how can we do better as a society to support them?

Delroy: It is difficult to know if fathers get meaningful support. However, I think they will accept any support given; most fathers desire to be good fathers. I believe fathers, or men on a whole, believe financial support is their biggest contribution and if they are not able to financially support the home they sometimes wilt under pressure and disappear.

If you have enjoyed this interview or any of the other two in this series, please leave a comment and let us know your thoughts. Thank you for visiting!